This is a diagram that I believe the Lord gave me to illustrate my experience in my healing journey. As I pursue intimacy with Jesus, I inevitably hit blocks that require healing. As these places are healed, I can go to deeper places of intimacy with him. At each of these points along the way, my awareness increases.
Intimacy – Healing – Awareness
As I continue on with my weekly Immanuel sessions, I am seeing a pattern developing. Intimacy with Jesus is the goal and target of Immanuel Prayer. It is from this deepening intimacy that I grow in my ability to abide with Him and all other aspects of my life flow (Matthew 6:33).
But I am finding that the wounds, and lies, and sin that block my heart from experiencing Jesus fully also block my ability to go deeper in intimacy with Him. So in my Immanuel sessions, I allow Him into those hurting places in my heart so that He can bring healing as only He can. Now, as these wounds in my heart are healed, I am able to be more intimate with Him.
As I grow in intimacy with Him, I inevitably hit a wall where my capacity will not allow me to go forward and move closer to Him. So I allow Him to be with me in whatever is in the way in my heart and bring healing. This allows me to go to a deeper intimacy connection with Him.
Are you sensing my pattern here? Round and round we go…
Here is another thing I am experiencing as this process unfolds…At each step, my awareness is growing. As a person who had zero awareness for the first 44 years of my life, this is a huge development. I am becoming aware when I am triggered. I am becoming aware when my relational circuits are “dim”. I can now sense when I am feeling connected to Jesus and others. And when I am not, I have a place (actually a Person) to go to do something about it.
In my session, I can meet face to face with Jesus and talk to Him about those feelings of disconnect. I can let them out into the Light instead of holding them in like I did my whole life. Even better, I can get a response from Him. He perfectly attunes to me in the present and gently leads me to the source and origin of this pain.
One word of warning…As a non-feeler my whole life, when this system gets turned on it is LIFE! I feel like I am feeling life for the first time. The warning part is that it is not always pleasant. I feel the bad stuff along with the good.
The diagram I made is my attempt to illustrate what I am experiencing. If it doesn’t make sense to you, or if this sounds like a foreign language, go meet with Jesus and a coach and get your healing. Do it as you are able. Weekly is ideal. Because it is going to happen; you will hit a wall, reach a plateau (or however you describe it) where it feels impossible to go deeper. That is the point that you need healing.
There is good news…When we feel like we have reached our limit, Jesus has an unlimited supply of whatever we need!